halaal mathematics based on jihadi murders – a question bank

November 18, 2022

Warning: This preposterous post is not for the faint-hearted. However, there may be some ‘educative value’ hiding in there, in the context of asking (& answering) ‘interesting’ basic arithmetic (and otherwise GK) questions that can be culled out of any ‘real’ or ‘practical’ scenarios…

So, read on, if you must.


Fact is that, in the past 3-4 decades or so, I have heard of so, so many murders committed by many practitioners of Islam – perpetrated primarily on infidels and kuf’rs – especially on ‘spouses’ – of either sex belonging to non-them.

That is, those virtuous crimes committed on Yezidis, Buddhists, Christians & (of course) Hindu spouses – and many of them do not come to light, because they are so so dark and have happened before ‘news’ started appearing in our living rooms & right on our handhelds – and also, in general, ‘decent’ …erm, Ostrich folks feel queasy talking about them.

Also, many such ‘decent’ folks, very conveniently refuse to see ANY pattern in them, in spite of

a) the stark reality & the empirical data/evidence staring at them

b) statistically highly disproportionate number emanating from young Muslim murderers, than from any other demographic

c) the background of the offending demographic that sees bloodshed related rituals & ritual slaughter as part of life

d) the ‘scriptural’ sanctions that exist which encourage its practitioners to slaughter non-them, meaning kuf’rs like the Hindus + to treat women as chattel

e) and memories (especially that of gore) becoming shorter for ‘decent folks’ and also being overloaded with nonsensical trivia… the works &

f) <fill in your favourites>

But that is all phantasmagorical reality.


Now, your problem is that, I always convert any available bit of information into a series of ‘practical problems’ for my hapless pupils to think over, identify, map, estimate, approximate & compute in general – just to give them some mental math training, not even affording them a suitable back-of-the-envelope.


A bloody comical interlude and a context:

Immediate, or The context:


As a semi-retired school teacher, I can’t resist setting ‘Madrasa-type Model Questions’ which are practically useful in daily life.

Annotated background:

A secular Islamic man (and an obvious darling of the Liberal-Left & Dravidian detritus) murders his infidel kuf’r Hindu girlfriend, neatly chops her body into 35 pieces over two days or so, packages them properly, stores them in a fridge … Oh so cool!

And then, the gent throws/distributes the pieces over 18 days in the Delhi area – just like Gandhiji’s ashes were distributed all over India. Oh so noble & poignant!

He also takes funds for the strenuous and artisanal work that he did, from the murdered girl’s account. Oh so ethical & professional!

He has also had a proper Work-Life balance because, even during his aforementioned professional work – he took care of his person, by bringing in nubile young ladies and doing whatever he chose to do with them. Oh so balanced!

And nobody knew about what he did, Oh so meticulous & clean!

Well, well… this scenario is rife with great possibilities for Q setting, Q as in Question, not Qur’an, mind you…

And, how cool it is going to be!


1. How many pieces did he cut per day?

2. If he were 200% more efficient, how many would he cut per day? How many days less would he take for the same effort?

3. How many Hindu women can be chopped up per year by that gentleman, assuming he makes use of available kuf’r women sequentially?

4. Assume a total volume for the chopped up pieces & the inner volume of an average fridge; now, initially what fraction of the fridge was occupied by the pieces? Draw a suitable graph of time Vs remaining pieces, marking & labeling data points.

5. Take a map of Delhi, join the points wherein the halaal cut human pieces were distributed & comment on the geometrical shape, thus arrived at.

6. The gent is ‘a cut above the rest’ – illustrate the idiom with three more examples, preferably similar.

7. Assume suitable populations of such men & such poor, ill-informed & love-lorn Hindu young women. Estimate how long it would take for the latter population to be completely decimated. Glory be to their God.

8. Write a short note on the psychological effects on such future young Muslim men, when India runs out of suitable Hindu women, to practice their skills on. Would the Indian society suffer because of the discrimination & oppression that the gents would hence be subjected to?

9. In order to produce a steady rate of Hindu women for such operations by gentlemen like Aftab, what should be the TFR (Total Fertility Rate) of Indian Hindus?

10. Justify the action of the Austere Scholar Aftab, based on specific verses of the Holy Quran.

11. India should celebrate such culinary, cooking related skills of chopping & efficient storage. Justify the statement.

12. The Austere scholar is in a deep study of geometry & human anatomy; therefore is a budding Nobel Laureate. Explain.

786. The Austere gent was actually trying to help India by reducing its population, intending to reduce global warming & to combat climate change. Explain why he deserves a Bharat Ratna.

Best wishes.

Score well.

You have nothing to lose but your young kuf’r ladies.



(of my sanity, our Bharatiyata & my ‘decency.’)

மேற்கண்ட பதிவு (அல்லது பின்னூட்டங்கள்) குறித்து (விருப்பமிருந்தால்) உரையாடலாமே...

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